Squirrel Football, Golf, Baseball and Polo; Motorcycle Style

So, I’m just riding along on my Kawasaki KLR 650, minding my own business, when out into the middle of the street runs a squirrel. I don’t know about you, but to me, that’s a straight up field-goal type challenge. I mean, hey if it’s in the street, you just have to kick it, right? (I know he’s doing it on purpose, because I saw those car insurance ads on TV where the squirrels made people crash their cars, so it must be real life…) LOL

So I lined up on the squirrel with my front tire, and pushed the throttle up to about 40 MPH. I dropped both feet to the pavement so that they were just skimming along about a half inch over the road. I then rotated my feet out, so that I had the widest possible squirrel whacking surface.

As I got close to him, he started to freak out and run in all directions at the same time. I’ve seen it in cartoons before, but never in nature. For a second, I thought I was going to go right over the top of him with my front tire, which would have been like hitting a home run (Yea, yea, different sport, sorry… I’ll try to keep my analogies or similes or whatever the hell they are within the same ball park.) But, at the last possible second, he bolted to my right and caught my foot right up his ass.

If you’ve never kicked a squirrel in the ass going 40 miles per hour, you should try it sometime. It’s really quite invigorating and makes you smile inside :) . It was kind of like hitting a nice straight drive 240 yards down the fairway. It was solid, felt good, and had that nice solid sound that goes with a good hit. (Whoops, different sport, sorry again.) For those of you who haven’t experienced the pleasure, you should give it a try. LOL

Squirrel Kicker Extraordinaire

3 Responses to “Squirrel Football, Golf, Baseball and Polo; Motorcycle Style”

  1. MNsqrlHntr says:

    In response to this article…
    At least 3 to 4 days per week I go hunting for squirrel, or deer currently. After reading your article I am thinking of getting a motorcycle for just this purpose. To repeat, it is almost impossible to find greys in the woods here in MN. But, at least every other day on my way to Bemidji State University, one or two run across the road right in my path. I can’t tell you how frustrating this is, when I’m almost able to walk up to these little guys in a tree on campus and almost strangle them to death… Of course, even bringing a bb gun on campus would get me put in jail for a very very long time. grrr

  2. Yea, I keep kidding about how I’m going to get a box of Twinkies, a bottle of Vodka and an airsoft rifle, and go down to the local park and whack squirrels until the local cops come and get me.

    I figure if I do it at 8:15 am, they’ll all be in the middle of their donut break and that’ll give me a couple extra minutes worth of squirrel shooting. LOL

  3. Paulius says:

    Any chance of mounting a camera on your bike so we can see it the next time you do that?

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